Presidential Debate 2012- Single Parenting

First off, I’m going to say the same thing I said in one of my facebook status updates: “I don’t pay attention to the Presidential elections… why? Who else took Political Science? President is just a figure-head. If you want to get worked up over an election look at who we vote into congress and the senate… they make the decisions…”

Secondly, I am not looking for a debate here. These are just my opinions and reactions to what I have heard a presidential candidate say and do. I feel the need to protect myself as a single mother and make a statement on what I have read.

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So I’m finally reading a transcript of the debate held on October 16th in Hempstead, NY. (Can be found here: http://www.mercurynews.com/politics-national/2012/10/live-second-presidential-debate-2012-transcript/) Did you know I attended Hofstra for a couple of years? Yeah I hated it 😛

Anyway, after many posts on facebook about Romney’s comments on Single parenting, i decided a little research was in order. Even after reading though, I’m still along the lines of ‘wtf’. How do you go from talking about AK-47’s to single parenting? And everything he said is general common sense.

Romney: “We need moms and dads, helping to raise kids. Wherever possible the — the benefit of having two parents in the home, and that’s not always possible. A lot of great single moms, single dads.” 

And that is the limit to his support of single parents. Then he goes on to speak bull about it.

Romney: “But gosh to tell our kids that before they have babies, they ought to think about getting married to someone, that’s a great idea.”

Really? Because we don’t already think and talk like that? Of course since we are single parents then we figure, why get married, right? Idiot. Of course we want our kids happy and married (to same or opposite sex, mind you). We want the best for our children. Just because we are not married doesn’t mean anything. You don’t know the circumstances of why we are put in our position.

Of course it is a great idea to get married.

One of my problems about being a single mom is I always feel like I am judged. People look at me and I feel they are thinking “where’s the father?”, or “another single mom”. Is it their business? No. But I still feel the judgement.

Instead of harking on the single mom, why not figure out ways to make more jobs available? Open more schools- being a teacher is perfect, I think, for being a single mom. You have the same hours (mostly) as your child.

Romney: “Because if there’s a two parent family, the prospect of living in poverty goes down dramatically.”

Again, really? Common sense. Two parents= two paychecks in most cases. Not to mention single parents are severely limited in what sort of hours they can work, and employers take advantage of that weakness.

How many jobs will be understanding? “My child is sick so I can’t come to work; my child is sick and I have to leave early; my child is acting up in school and I have to leave early”

And even if your job is understanding, how much patience do they really have? Do you know how it feels to have to say that to your boss, while in the back of your mind you remain fearful that you will be fired because you can’t be at your job as often as you are needed?

Romney: “The opportunities that the child will — will be able to achieve increase dramatically.”

That is not necessarily true. How many two parent homes have children that cannot get the opportunities you speak of? How many women stay in abusive homes simply because they feel that their child should have both parents?

Is this what we want?

What’s next? Will there be a law passed forbidding people with children from getting divorced? Then, if the divorce is allowed, will the mother be out of luck since her husband will have the better job (in some cases! I know it’s stereotypical, but still statistically accurate)

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After reading through that section of the debate, I had to do a little more digging. Of course, like most web searches, I came upon a Wiki page for Willard Mitt Romney. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mitt_Romney). No i don’t take everything Wiki has for truth, but I did follow some of the resource links and happened upon an article in Vanity Fair from February 2012.

What I found is disturbing and disgusting.

“They chitchatted for a few minutes. Then Romney said something about the church’s adoption agency. Hayes initially thought she must have misunderstood. But Romney’s intent became apparent: he was urging her to give up her soon-to-be-born son for adoption, saying that was what the church wanted… In that moment, she also felt intimidated. Here was Romney, who held great power as her church leader and was the head of a wealthy, prominent Belmont family, sitting in her gritty apartment making grave demands. “And then he says, ‘Well, this is what the church wants you to do, and if you don’t, then you could be excommunicated for failing to follow the leadership of the church,’” (Kranish, Michael and Scott Helman, “The Meaning of Mitt”, Vanity Fair Feb. 2012)

Talking a woman into give a child up for adoption? (http://www.vanityfair.com/politics/2012/02/mitt-romney-201202 see bottom of page 2 and into page 3) Where do you have the right? That is her child! A child she carried and loved and cared about for nearly 10 months. Not to mention the horror stories that we hear about foster homes and ‘the system’ and adoptions. Yet you have the gall, the audacity, to say “this is what the church wants”. You have no right to say that to anyone!

Read the article. It is a must.

I do understand how people are raised with a church to have beliefs and want to stick to those beliefs. I hold nothing against anyone who holds to their ideals and church views.

But guess what? They are the views of you and your church, not me and mine. Don’t push your ideology down my throat.

I believe that a man should be able to marry the man he loves and a woman should be able to marry the woman she loves. I believe that you should love the person, not their gender (or organs). Love me for me, not because I’m a woman, but because I have a great personality and am fun to be around.

I am a straight woman. I do not believe that homosexuality, bisexuality, or transexuality are sins.

This is the ‘Land of the Free’. You are free to be who you want to be and so am I.

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Where is this country going? I fear for my independence if this is the sort of person we want in office. Who knows what will happen. If he becomes president and begins to initiate changes like the ones I have heard, I’m leaving the US.

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Well, that is the end of my ranting. I had to get that off my chest. It just seems ridiculous that this person would be able to be a ‘role model’ to children. Politics is really not my thing, but when it affects me personally or statements such as the above are made, I can’t stay quiet.

You will all have an update on Lil Bit hopefully by the end of the day. 🙂